January 10, 2024

The Next Proposal: When and How to Ask Your Bridal Party to Be In Your Wedding

There’s no better feeling than sharing the news of your engagement with friends and family. After the onslaught of congratulations, you face the daunting task of planning a wedding, including the second proposal—asking those closest to you to join your bridal party.

So, when is the right time to pop the question, “Will you be part of my bridal party?” Is there any etiquette to it? Should you just come out with it or think of a creative way of asking?

It boils down to what suits you best, but we’ve done some research to help you make the right decisions. Read on to find some ideas on how to ask your bridal party to be in the wedding.

When to Ask Your Bridal Party to Be In the Wedding

two bridesmaids hugging the bride holding champagne glasses

Of course, you can ask them whenever you like! However, there are a few things to consider to avoid running into any hiccups.

Don’t Rush Into It

wedding to do list surrounded by presents and calendars

Some brides and grooms knew who they wanted to include in their wedding party before they even began dating. Even if this is the case, you should still take a little time before asking them. There are lots of logistical details to iron out! You want to be prepared to answer any questions your friends and family will have once they agree to be part of your big day.

First, Create a Solid Plan

couple working on wedding planning document

Before asking, make sure you’re prepared for any response. It’s always best to have a contingency plan in case someone declines or if you decide to add more people later on. This will save you from any awkwardness or uncertainty down the line.

And don’t forget! You’ll need to discuss these decisions with your partner first. Decide if you both want the wedding party to match on each side. It would be terrible to have to revoke your request to someone because your partner can’t fill their side of the wedding party.

How Soon is Too Soon?

wedding rings on a calendar

If you have a long engagement period, it’s a good idea to wait until 8-12 months before the wedding. Unfortunately, how close you are to certain people can change. Surely you wouldn’t want someone you feel you hardly know anymore at your bridal table instead of a new best friend.

If you have a shorter engagement period, make sure you give the bridal party enough notice to begin planning for the big day—about 5-8 months. Your bridal party needs to know they can commit to being there for all the events since they help you organize your wedding.

Know The Details First

wedding color palette spread

Your bridal party has some organizing of their own to do. Just a few of the things they help out with are:

Before you consider how to ask your bridal party to be in the wedding, make sure you know the more specific details of your wedding like the colors, themes, and venue. The more they know about your wedding, the easier it will be for them to judge how they should go about these plans. You want them to feel confident in knowing what they’re signing up for! 

Plus, if you have any specific requests or preferences for their involvement, make sure to communicate that as well.

How to Ask the Bridal Party to Be In the Wedding

bridal party with the bride in matching silk robes

Are you ready to check off “choosing a bridal party” on your wedding planning list? We can help you streamline the process with creative ideas for this proposal! 

Plan to Ask Separately or All Together

future bride asking friend to be bridesmaid at dinner

A standing tradition is to ask the best man and the maid of honor on their own. This can help to avoid any poorly masked jealousy from the rest of your bridal party.

Some brides like to ask everyone in the bridal party all at once. This can also work. You can make an event out of it or surprise them out of the blue.

Even though you want to accommodate everyone’s feelings, it is essential to remember that this is your wedding! You are entitled to invite your closest friends to be a part of your big day. Feel confident in your decision-making!

Some Fun Ideas For Asking

a cluster of filled champagne glasses

Your friends and family would love a personal phone call asking them to be in your bridal party—but why not make it even more special? Here are 10 fun ideas for how to ask your bridal party to be in the wedding:

1. Proposal Box

preparing care package seasonal gift box

Give your loved ones a special gift box with a bunch of goodies, confetti, and a card! You could even include some sentimental pictures of you together.

2. Bake Some Cookies

homemade cookies in a box

Bake some cookies and ice the big question on them. Everyone loves a homemade treat, especially if the secret ingredient is love!

3. Confetti-Filled Balloons

confetti balloons

Fill some balloons with confetti and add a handwritten note. They’ll have to pop the balloon to find out what it says!

4. Customized Champagne Glasses

waiter pouring champagne in glasses on the tray

Order customized champagne glasses with “bridal party” or “bridesmaid” written on them and surprise your guests at a classy dinner. 

5. Scratch-off Cards

Create your own scratch-off cards with the question hidden underneath—or, for convenience, buy them pre-made! You can even find scratch-and-sniff cards for an extra surprise.

6. Personalized Candles

aesthetic candle

Order personalized candles with their names and your wedding date on them. Everyone loves a good-smelling candle, and you can find the perfect scent to match each person.

7. DIY Flower Bouquets

guy and girl in a greenhouse with tulips

If you’re the bride, this is our favorite answer to “How to ask your bridal party to be in your wedding.” Make your own flower bouquets and attach a note asking the recipient to be your bridesmaid! You could even use the flowers to announce your wedding colors.

8. Customized Jewelry or Accessories

shot of a bridesmaid with jewelry

Order customized jewelry or accessories with the recipient’s initials on them for an extra extravagant surprise. This could be a bracelet, necklace, clutch, etc.

9. Fortune Cookies with a Twist

fortune cookies with heart stickers

Order some customized fortune cookies with your question written inside; then, pop the question during dessert after a fun night out!

10. Personalized Photo Album or Scrapbook

woman looking at scrapbook

Gather some of your favorite photos with each member of the bridal party and create a personalized photo album or scrapbook. We’ve agreed that this is the most heartfelt way to ask them to be by your side on your special day.

Don’t forget—the final decision for how to ask your bridal party to be in the wedding depends on what you and your partner want. It’s your wedding after all!

Find Your Dream Wedding Venue at Marinaj Banquets and Events

Marinaj Royal Venue

At Marinaj Banquets and Events, we want you and your bridal party to feel as special and loved as possible. That’s why we offer three magical wedding venues in California!  We’re dedicated to making your big day unforgettable so your family and friends can share in your happiness.

Contact us today to schedule a tour—we can’t wait to be part of your wedding journey!